Dear Spirit of Showers
I really do not understand what I have done wrong.
Every time I have had a shower since the plumber came and installed the new unit, I have thanked you and felt deep gratitude for the hot water at the flick of a switch. I have been careful with my water use and I gave you a tribute: I donated money to Water Aid so that other people, less fortunate than me, could access clean water.
Was it because I had a bath yesterday? Do you feel that I have been unfaithful to you? Honestly, I just wanted to soak in some warm water for a while and relax my muscles. I feel that refusing to let me wash my hair afterwards under the shower was a bit petty.
I know that the shower itself is not broken and that it is the electrical switch in the ceiling that has failed this time, so perhaps it’s the spirit of electricity who is punishing me, but I can’t help being suspicious since it’s the only electrical problem I am experiencing and it is, once again, the shower that is affected.
I consider it particularly mean that you made this happen an hour and a half after the departure of Mr Snail – who could have fixed it (he’s good with electricity, even if he does struggle with carpentry). I also think that making the cord snap as I gave it a sharp tug, so that I got whacked across the back of my hand was just adding injury to insult.
I am afraid that you give me no choice but to abandon you and go and have a shower elsewhere… thank goodness for friends.
Yours in exasperation
The Snail of Happiness